@SeanEmeny

They say “confidence” is the most attractive quality in a partner. But I’d have to say “not banging my friends” would be a very close 2nd

@lalastrailer

If I had a dollar for everyone I work with who’s dumber than me, I’d have $11 cause I work for a small company.

@Chonfucius

Eh wah eh wah eh wah eh wah joget joget joget joget joget gelek gelek gelek gelek gelek gelek lembek lembek lembek embek lembek lembek

@KKAlThani

I wouldn’t take a bullet for you but I’d definitely push someone in front of you to take it for you. Same thing.

@sirrruh

My secret ingredient is letting somebody else cook.

@Pierre__4

The only thing we have to fear is fear itselfnnANDnnWhen a women asks if you notice anything different

@Bird_Horowitz

Lets get freaky. I mean really Freaky. Like I can’t look you in the eye for two days kinda freaky.

@Annoyedworld

I suck my stomach in when ever I weigh myself!nnIt doesn’t make me weigh less but at least I can see the numbers!

@trevso_electric

If eHarmony were honest, it would pair some people with a room full of cats.

@RadOrDie

Give the chick a break. Kristen Stewart TOTALLY looks sorry. Or happy. Or sad. Or constipated.