Tomorrow I’m gonna chase someone…like really run after them..screaming and everything.


It’s possible to suck at everything if you put your mouth to it.


You can tell a lot about a person by the type of car they drive. For example, if they drive a Taxi, they’re probably a cab driver.


Yeah, but I thought the whole point of twitter was to be stalked.nnThe word ‘follower’ should be evidence of that


I’m so glad we could finally reconnect after all these years because I’d really like your help on my virtual farm.


Frogs always look like they just found out there’s no free Wi-Fi.


Girls, your friends lied when they said chopping your hair off looked cute. They are just happy that their man wont want to bang you