@BBQJones28

Tomorrow I’m gonna chase someone…like really run after them..screaming and everything.

@Kobbejaeger

It’s possible to suck at everything if you put your mouth to it.

@UnderTheJewFro

You can tell a lot about a person by the type of car they drive. For example, if they drive a Taxi, they’re probably a cab driver.

@Token_Geezer

Yeah, but I thought the whole point of twitter was to be stalked.nnThe word ‘follower’ should be evidence of that

@glenyrd

I’m so glad we could finally reconnect after all these years because I’d really like your help on my virtual farm.

@GreenishDuck

Frogs always look like they just found out there’s no free Wi-Fi.

@reesespiece_

Girls, your friends lied when they said chopping your hair off looked cute. They are just happy that their man wont want to bang you