@Chhapiness

*Password must be hard to guess*

New Password: H0neyWhatDoYouWantForDinner?

You Might Also Like

@GreenishDuck

No one is more shocked that I brought my cat to a baseball game than my cat.

@stephenjmolloy

Me with megaphone: “COME DOWN FROM THERE. YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LIVE FOR.”
Man: “I’m fixing your roof tiles, remember?”
Me: “I FORGOT!”

@papasuncle

A screensaver for my face when someone has been talking too long.

@chelliet22

You can’t live on Cheetos and Oreos alone.

But God knows I’ve tried.

@KenJennings

FREE $1,000,000,000 IDEA: a Tumblr-type platform for list-making called Schindlr

@ddsmidt

I’m sorry. I know I said hi, but I wasn’t really prepared for any follow-up conversation.

@andylassner

The Samsung Galaxy is a cool phone if you don’t mind carrying around a 42″ screen.

@flaskofwhiskeyy

Whoever said “out of sight, out of mind” has never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.

@WheelTod

Now kids have it easy. When I was young, the hot singles in my area had to walk the streets yelling they wanted sex with me thru a megaphone