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@UnFitz: "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain."
- me, peeping at you in the shower
@Bob_Janke: *washing motorcycle with my shirt off
*cops show up
Cops: That guy told you to stay away from his motorcycle
@sarcasticmommy4: I hate it when I'm on twitter & there isn't a car behind me to honk when the light is green.
@youngestneil: I bet parents get annoyed when their kids ask "are we there yet?" when they're fully aware they now live in a car
@Crunch11b: "This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall."
-Every 2 year old with a Popsicle.