@Holy_Mowgli: peter parker, bitten by radio-active spider: *donates $65 to NPR*
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@TheWeirdWorld: Maybe people are the dumbest creatures on Earth, and animals just pretend to be dumber to avoid talking to us.
@Michabean: Careful...I've already had our entire fight in my head and it doesn't end well for you.
@bornmiserable: [Verizon] SALESMAN: Can I interest you in our friends and family plan? BATMAN: [just starts crying]
@Herbs1996: Hate when older people say "you're too young to be tired" alright Margret you're too old to be alive but here we are