This is so embarrassing, what’s your name again?
– me, the first 30 times I meet everyone
Nigerian Prince won the Powerball jackpot and he’s emailing everyone now.
You Might Also Like
The postman told me he’s off to Spain tomorrow so I asked was he going to Parcelona and he ignored what I believe to be my best joke of 2014
I’d kill for a body like that BUT I WILL NOT EXERCISE FOR IT
Someone called me
yesterday and said,
“Hello, is this Ross”
I said ” no it’s Chandler”
And they hung up.
So much for trying to
WIFE: I’ve child-proofed the house
*our child walks in*
ME: Yeah, great job, Linda
Please say a prayer for my 8 year old son, he has to write 4 sentences.
Today was so terrible, I thought
Steven Seagal was in it.
I refused to ask a guy with a Blackberry what time it was because he doesn’t even know what year it is.
My husband said he needs to have sex and now he is mad at me. Apparently, asking ‘with each other’ was the wrong response.
Who’s ready for Friday?!