@_steamy_mac: Pour some sugar on me. More. Keep going. Okay, now bricks.
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@bridger_w: When a cop asks if you know why you were pulled over, respond, "I'm actually not allowed to discuss the details of the case"
@captainkalvis: Me: *loudly* why is everyone here a goth Wife: quiet down you're interrupting the funeral Me: *whispering* why is everyone here a goth
@PaperWash: me: God? God: yes my child me: I need help- God: ask and thou shall receive me: -moving into my new apt God: me: God: me: hello?