There’s Angie, and then there’s Drunk Angie, and one of us tried to make it to Mexico on an exercise bike.
*quits Twitter to spend time with family*
*remembers what family is like*
*quits family for Twitter*
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*Seductively forgets you*
The wife wants me to be a doctor in our sex role playing. So I guess I’ll make her wait an hour, then send her to a specialist
Megan with an h? Whatever Hmegan….
Hello this is ur pilot speaking
We almost began our descent but my copilot said “turn down for what” so
looks like we r rerouting to Cancun
Bad luck, Atheists named Christian.
My best friend is marrying my husband’s best friend. What could possibly go wrong?
New sheets new sheets watcha gonna do whatcha gonna do when I sleep in you