@tsm560: Real doesn’t scare me, real stupid does
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@Blarebare: The pet groomer didn't appreciate the 10 dollar bill I slid across the table to give my dog the "happy ending".
@OohSnapItsChris: Anyone want to volunteer to dress up as a dragon for me and kidnap my girlfriend? I always wanted to save a princess. No weirdos please
@gwatts77: If I donate blood and you're in an unfortunate circumstance of needing it don't blame me for never being able to pass a drug test again.