@InternetHippo: *sees an article from 2 months ago* This is useless to me. Who cares how the ancients lived
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@: Idk y men go to bars to meet women? Go to Target. The female to male ratio is 10 to 1 and they’re already looking for things they don’t need
@stephenjmolloy: [Awards ceremony] "And winner of 'The Most Unusual Name of the Year' goes to... drum roll please..." Drumroll Please: "Thanks so much!"