@curlymalloy: Shit, I just wasted a good corn dog, by eating It with no guys around.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@: Every group chat births a second smaller group chat without the annoying people, and if you think yours doesn't, I have some bad news
@flashember: [Alligator feeding at the zoo] Me: Hey let me do it Keeper: 1st time? M: Heck no *alligator takes me by the arm* I WAS JUST BRAGGING SAVE ME
@ThugRaccoons: Friend: Did you know most people mistake thirst for hunger? Me: Really? Weird. Hey, are you going to eat that water bottle?
@Dutch_50: I'll bet even homeless people look at funeral homes and think, "Nope. I'd rather stay out here."