@Holy_Mowgli: sister in law asked me to get yellow onion from the store. lady it’s called a lemon
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@9GAG: Apparently Neil Armstrong used to tell unfunny jokes about the Moon, and follow them up with "Ah, I guess you had to be there."
@HitsBelowBelt: You know that feeling you get when you meet someone and your heart skips a beat? Ya, that's arrhythmia. You can die from that.
@TheThomason: Star Wars movies now feel like when your dad caught you smoking and said "Oh you like cigarettes? Well now you're gonna smoke a whole pack."