Reasons to jump:
3. Bungee jumping
4. Kris Kross made you
Someone just asked me if I was ‘happily’ married.
Single people are adorable.
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*eats one piece of lettuce*
checks for abs
“you should be more serious, sir. this is arson.” “no this is MY son!” *tousles his hair* “ha ha ha. so how many houses did the rascal burn”
I followed this woman on a bike with an empty baby seat for a half a mile yelling, “your baby jumped out!” before she gave me the finger.
I’m not a racist. Racism is a crime and crime is for black people.
i just saw a black girl rt one of those teenage girl accounts saying “i honestly wish I was a teen in the 50’s”………. no u don’t
OH. WE’RE HALFWAY THERE. WHOA OH. PIGEONS WITH NICE HAIR.
So many village idiots. So few dragons.
Saw a hawk swoop down over the highway and fly off with a snake in his mouth and I can’t even switch lanes while eating a Twizzler.