@jordan_stratton: Sometimes I break into hives. But only because I hate bees.
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@thepaulahunt: Autocorrect changed "I'll see you in a while" to "I'll see you in a hole", and now I'm being questioned by the police.
@UrbanDouchebag: I'm going to hire a Priest, a Doctor and a Rabbi to walk into a bar together just to see WTF happens. Backup Plan: I'll also bring a horse.
@AsgardianRose: Autocorrect changed "panic attack" to "pancake attack" and now I'm hysterical AND hungry.