@LoneWolfStories: Sometimes I like to surprise my neighbours by smiling and waving back at them.
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@SarcasticAlly12: You know in a video game when you kept pushing b to get through the talking part but later realized you should've read it? That's adulthood.
@SteveKoehler22: My mother always cooked with wine while I was growing up back home. Occasionally she would even add some to whatever she was cooking.
@DamonHunzeker: I hate when you let your hostages outside to play on the trampoline, and then they just sit there and don't even jump or have fun.
@ArfMeasures: Wife: omg it's happening Me: what is? *the lights go out, wind rattles the windows* Wife: the baby is coming Me: what?! Wife: the baby is coming right now Me: you're not pregnant! *door creaks open* Wife: run