@MarieLoerzel: Sorry, I called you by accident. I was actually just trying to delete your number from my phone.
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@AnkCoupleTO: [coming out of coma] Doc: You survived the heart attack Me: I'm going to eat right & get fit D: *shows me hospital bill* M: *pulls plug*
@meganamram: Idea: "Celebrity Price Is Right" where Gwyneth Paltrow guesses that loaves of bread cost $460
@Tmoney68: My GF called me "behind the times" today. I got so upset, I paused the VCR, paged my friends & asked them to fax me their best advice.
@upsidedowntrash: After a long journey Frodo and Sam arrive to return the One Ring to the fires of Mt. Doom Frodo: Dude dont be mad, but I forgot the receipt