@Manda_like_wine: Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@stereoskyline: Procrastination has taught me how to do 30 minutes of work in 8 hours and 8 hours of work in 30 minutes.
@michelleDbelle: Taught a lesson on fossils and dinosaurs today. 6yo: (raises hand) Me: Yes? (Thinking: please don’t ask if I was alive when dinosaurs roamed the earth) 6yo: Did you ever get chased by a dinosaur when you were a kid?
@PrisonCookies: Just once I’d like to open a can of biscuits without having to beat it like it stole my last cookie