@KizerBillhelm: Sorry I yelled "April Fool's" while you were proposing to your girlfriend.
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@causticbob: MISSING: Black and white cat with red collar. Very intelligent. Mittens, if you're reading this, please come home.
@Prince_Smarming: Imagine my surprise when I found out "restraining order" did not mean she wanted me to tie her up.
@reczit: I'm afraid of people who keep smiling all the time. I feel like they still have plenty of space left for more bodies in their basement.