@gobmentcheese: Start hating people now, so you don't have to buy them a Christmas present. Don't wait until the last minute.
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@MrGeorgeWallace: Where in the hell are Dora the Explorer's parents? Do they know she's riding a damn crocodile into a volcano?
@CovertAgentP: Hollywood sets impossible standards we can never live up to. Not even once have I saved people from dinosaurs with my knowledge of Unix.
@ABurgerADay: It's okay if you didn't notice that I switched my beard trimmer's setting from 6 to 5. The difference is stubble.
@SadPeruna: Until you show me in the corporate dress code where it says masks & capes aren't allowed, I must refuse to reveal my identity to the others.