@TheGrimKing: Starting my diet and training tomorrow; hope I can count on your support and prayers that I die in my sleep. Please RT.
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@infinityonhi: Anyone else always bring about 3x as many knickers as they need when they’re going away somewhere like oh just incase I piss myself every single day of this trip
@Lisabug74: I spilled red wine on my white pants. So I decided to sprinkle blue glitter on them too. I'm now a top seller on Etsy.
@Elizasoul80: I'm gonna hire a person to speak at my funeral and say a bunch of crazy stuff about me so my friends and family think I had a secret life.
@WildeThingy: Teacher "Hi, why are you here?" Me "Um, isn't this the beginners' philosophy class?" Teacher "Yes and you're off to a really bad start."