Poached salmon on a bed of brown rice with peas or Roasted duck with polenta and organic green beans?
Choosing dog food is hard.
[taking long drag from cigarette] if the blackbox can’t be destroyed then why don’t they just make the whole plane out of the blackbox material
flight attendant: you are absolutely not allowed to smoke in here
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Justin Bieber’s to be the new face of Calvin Klein. Awful news given he does such a terrible job of being the current face of Justin Bieber.
This year I’m going to put the mistletoe in my back pocket, so people I hate can kiss my ass.
Okay with female deers & drops of golden sun. But always felt that “La” deserved a better identity than “a note to follow So”
Kids today are so spoiled with their yummy gummy vitamins. It’s nothing like when I was a kid and we had to chew on orange-flavored chalk.
Parenting is having your kids reject everything you cook, and then watching the 2yo eat a dog treat and ask for another.
my kid thought that we eat kidneys and liver from humans
what scares me is that she didn’t care
I don’t think I’m a father but I better celebrate just incase I am…
what sorcery is this? How does my VLC player know its christmas ????
I saw an image of Jesus in my breakfast burrito. I asked myself, what would Jesus do? And so I ate him. Two hours later… Holy Shit!