@TommyKarate: Thank you for calling. To speak with a human being, please hang up and travel back to the early 1990's.
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@nice_mustard: *on time travel bus* oh you're going back to kill hitler? uh yeah totally, me too *pulls jacket over spice girls world tour '98 t shirt*
@JeremyKCMO: You drunkenly fall into one bathtub with your pants around your ankles, breaking the curtain rod and all of a sudden, everyone is a critic
@HenpeckedHal: Coroner's Report: "Victim noted a subtle mannerism shared by his wife and mother-in-law."
@OhNoSheTwitnt: [Batman at McDonald's] What's your chicken sandwich called? -A McChicken And the rib? -A McRib [pulls out his batwallet] I like your style.