Few people realize that before they were domesticated, the wild vacuum cleaner was the only natural predator of wolves…
Hence, dogs instinctive reaction to them today.
Thanks for the 27 hashtags describing your pic otherwise I would have never known it’s a hamburger
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“you should have used a tag”
[a horse emerges on luggage belt]
noone else has brought a horse linda
[another horse appears]
I traced the call. It was phone-shaped.
GF: every time we fight you start interpretive dancing
*i dance beautifully for 12 minutes*
GF: I DONT KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!
[ugly sweater contest]
*takes home the gold*
Oh white people,
is there anything you won’t try to fix with a 5K run/walk?
What’s that? Been thinking about us having another kid? Hold on, honey.
*calls son into room
Check it out, he glued a football to his head
Husband:-“So when you starting back at the gym”?
H:-“Because you need to”
His funeral takes place next week.
In WWII soldiers left burlesque magazines around so if an enemy found it he’d yell “HOt DOG” then howl like a wolf & give away his position