@BlindChow

“That’ll be $19.94.”
*pulls out $50 bill*
“Sorry, we’ve had a problem with counterfeit bills. Have anything smaller?”
*pulls out $25 bill*

You Might Also Like

@Shen_the_Bird

[first day as a 911 operator]

guy: send help oh god the building is collapsing!

me: you’re kinda stressing me out tbh

@ericsshadow

My father always told me “You can accomplish anything you set your mind to.” I must have set my mind to calories.

@mishakey

If you stop at a yellow light I’m going to assume you have something illegal in your car.

@valerie_tosi

In the Phoenix airport & I just heard a guys laptop say “you’ve got mail”. Pretty sure I’ve landed in 1998.

@cosmicbibi

My hobbies include humming the Jurassic Park theme song to my chickens, to make them feel more in touch with their ancestors.

@joeveix

Definitely never want to own a small fruit stand in an action movie.

@Sassafrantz

Ghosts are pretty cool because they can literally do anything they want, but they choose to hide my keys.