@drinksmcgee: That’s exactly what harmful coconut water would say.
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@alexlumaga: The early bird catches a worm. The on-time bird catches a different worm. The late bird also catches a worm. There are tons of worms and they have no human concept of time
@Thynebear: "What? Only 2% Milk? Then what's the other 98%!?" [bull walking confidently out of the factory] Oh you don't wanna know
@BryMastas: When you're pushing 40, the real life challenge is to find the pic angle where you don't look like Jabba the Hut.
@fishbowel: Date: omg it’s so dark do you have a flashlight Me: I don’t need one cause I have all the light I need right here- Date: aww Me: oh my feet *i stomp and my light up sketchers start flashing*