@: The atoms that make up your body are ancient things, recycled over millions of years. You are made of stars, and also dead raccoons.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Don't spit at your sister! 4: I'm a bunny. Me: Bunnies don't spit. 4: I'm an acid-spitting bunny.
@dmc1138: This one time, I got kicked out of the audience of "Cats" on Broadway for bringing a laser pointer.
@markedly: Movie Theater: *lights go down* Me: *quietly removes entire thanksgiving feast from backpack*
@okimstillhungry: Me on Masterchef: Ive made a roasted pork kebab breaded with buttermilk cornbread and served with a tomato reduction Them: This is a corndog