Finally achieved… world peas.
the man next to me at this airport bar just sent at least 30 cry laugh emojis to a person in a text while he sat stoically drinking a heineken
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wife: I am having an affair
me: *handing menu back to waiter* I’ll have the affair as well
It is true. Time flies when you are having fun.
However it is also true that Time eventually rests on a tree branch and shits on your head.
good work, everybody
Dorothy: Follow the Yellow Brick Road.
Yellow Brick Road: I have a boyfriend.
UK, 2019 – “FREE BROADBAND FOR ALL”
UK, 2020 –
the ocean is technically soup bc it has salt veggies meat and it’s been heating up
This peach mimosa tastes like I’ll be worrying about losing my job later.
A dating site that connects Tupperware containers with lost lids.
Have kids close in age so they can be friends and so you don’t sleep for 7 years.