The people who shout the loudest about their all powerful God protecting them & delivering them from any evil, also own a gun, just in case.

You Might Also Like


Just replaced the cat litter with 44 packages of pop rocks…

And now we wait.


Marriage. Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work.


Sitting behind a couple in this theater that’s making out. I’m gonna lean forward and whisper “This is nice” in a minute.


Why do they sell clementines in an orange fish net package? They’re already sexy.


I saw on a package of condoms they had a money back guarantee. So how does that work? Do I just mail the baby to them?


A marriage built on respect and trust can survive anything. Except losing twice as much weight on a diet than your wife, apparently.


Therapist: we need to work on YOU taking responsibility for YOUR actions

Me: *pulls a flask out* WHO PUT THIS IN MY PURSE?


It’s so cute how you think wearing that cross around your neck exempts you from being a reasonable human being