The Water Board sent me a notice saying that my bill was a year old,

I obviously apologised for forgetting, and sent them a birthday card.

You Might Also Like


(Macbeth and lady Macbeth)
“I killed King Duncan”
Macbeth wtf!!
“You told me to!!”
I didn’t think you’d do it omg lmao savage


Most people will give you their jacket if you’re naked and tell them you come from the future.


If you REALLY need to get laid tonight, put on your oldest or most ridiculous underwear. It works every single time.


They must have had a really good laugh when doctors realized that thermometers could be taken orally too.


u could put a horse in a time machine and send it to any era and the horse’s life would literally be the same


Bad cop *plants drugs in perps car*
Gardener cop *adds mulch & Miracle-Gro®*