@behindyourback: The worst is that a 27 y/o who wanted to marry Charles Manson & charge ppl to see his corpse had more of a future financial plan than we do.
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@iliezabeth: ME: can u pick me up in ur claws DRAGON: go AWAY dammit ME: can u just put me in ur mouth pls—I wanna look out from ur teeth like im in jail
@jctwritesstuff: Him: What are you doing? Me: Rollin' bones. Him: I'll roll your bones. *wraggles eyebrows* Me: Him: *winks* Me: *does voodoo-y stuff* Him: *turns into a hedgehog*
@Fred_Delicious: Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face
@SteveSuckington: Will Smith: "Jaden, I want you to star in this 100 million dollar movie with me" My Dad: "Shut up and hold this flashlight Steve"