@Bluestmoon_: There are pants in the bathroom trash can at work, so someone is having a worse day than you.
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@TheAlexNevil: Me: There are plenty of ways to skin a cat Cat (pulls out switchblade): Oh, you wanna dance, tweet boy? C’mon - bring it!
@ibid78: Bro do you even watch The Notebook and weep softly, mourning the eternal nature of love juxtaposed against the fallibility of memory, bro?
@lecalabara: Hey Doorknob, if I wanted something in my life that was hairy, condescending and using me for food, I would get a cat.
@MattMcC1: "nice dog or cat or baby or whatever" i offer politely, my eyes scanning the room for the taco dip. "was it expensive?"