It’s like my racist grandpa used to say: “Good morning.”
That unrepentant bigot had many flaws, but cordial salutations wasn’t one of them.
There is no cool way to zip up your pants during a meeting.
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birds can make their homes in tall treetops and soar at great heights and pigeons are like no thank you i will commute by foot to home depot
I was so devastated by my divorce that I barely finished the eleventh grade…
Finally found a job ad that didn’t mention ‘attention to detail’ or ‘team player’. Finally!
I’m gonna date the first guy to come out of this “Free STD Screenings!” van.
“Quark, quark,” said the quantum duck.
The glory of fall.
Lord please give me patience, because if you give me strength I may just beat someone to death.
*Orders something on Amazon because I need a box*
The average person has sex 89 times a year.
This is gonna be one hell of a week.