“They call me Mr Six Hours,” I told her, trying to make it sound like a sex thing not the amount of time my head was stuck in a beehive for

You Might Also Like


Ever have that fantasy of pulling over on the side of the highway and running into the woods and disappearing for a few years?

Just me?


People who live in Lego houses should not walk around without shoes.


Doctor Who. He can travel to any planet during any period but mostly ends up in places that look like present day England.


My doctor said NO drinking for 2 weeks,then we both laughed.


I just found the Covid-19 Yelp page and left such a scathing review that it may kill the virus.


I received a call from a charity asking me to donate clothes for starving people. Anyone who can fit into my clothes isn’t starving!


IT: You deleted the OS?

Me: I think so.

IT: It didn’t warn you?

Me: Yeah, but it only kinda warned me. What’s with the inquisition bro?


Total shocker that you actually have to pay for things when you get to the register. Go ahead and dump your purse on the counter. We’ll wait


Falling in love is like diving into a tin of marshmallows, then hitting your head on the bottom.