@ilovepie84: They say rabbits don't have glasses because they eat carrots. They also don't have thumbs. I like my thumbs so i don't eat carrots.
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@JeffLoveness: "I would absolutely say I'm an introvert!" - Guy screaming to his table full of friends at brunch.
@TommyKarate: Procrastination is a dish best served tomorrow.
@jordan_stratton: "I want frog legs." -Fancy restaurant order or the coolest plastic surgery request ever
@DurtMcHurtt: COMCAST: have you considered getting with the world's number one selling broadband? ME: [thinking he meant the Spice Girls] ..all the time.
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