Guys, I gotta run. I left the fire place video streaming.
Things the GOP has battled this week:
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CAS’S TELEPORTING SKILLS HAVE BEEN EXPOSED
It’s only been a few days, but I’m starting to forget everything I knew about Mitch Romley.
Maybe mama duck isn’t leading her babies, maybe she’s trying to outrun them.
My wife acts like she wants to have sex, but then we don’t. I googled it, it’s called cuddling.
I dream to live in a world where I can politely get out of plans by saying, “I’m so sorry, but I just remembered I don’t want to”
Current life status – By the time I figure out what nostril is plugged, it jumps to the other side.
“U put on suntan lotion?”
“Youll get sunburned!”
*sun descends, his voice echoes loudly*
“NICE BICEPS BRO, UR LIL SISTER LOAN EM TO U?”
Her: I bet you forgot it.
Him: I have a photographic memory.
Him: Sorry, it’s a Polaroid. Is it Becky?