Me: Wanna role play?
Wife: Sure 😉
Me: You be the chef/waitress and I’ll be the custom..WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!
|T|h|i|n|k| |I| |f|o|u|n|d| |s|o|m|e|t|h|i|n|g| |m|o|r|e| |a|n|n|o|y|i|n|g| |t|h|a|n| |h|a|s|h|t|a|g|s|
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“Press 2 if you’re a virgin”
“Press 3 if y-”
STOP TALKING, DAD! I’m trying to call Xbox support
If you cannot afford a stenographer, a 4 year old will be appointed for you to repeat exactly what you said at all times. Do you understand?
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My son kneed himself on the trampoline.
*black eye forming
Me: Son, we need to come up with a better story than this.
*putting kid to bed*
Me: Goodnight, buddy, I love you.
7yo: Dad, you have to make sugar cookies to bring to class tomorrow. Goodnight!