Oh, you don’t like my Lego jokes?
HAHA, get it?!
Today we pretended we were dining out and it felt so real because right after the first bite my kids decided to go potty
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Some of my best friends started out as bad choices.
Prepare your kids for social media by putting their artwork on the fridge and writing a bunch of mean comments under it.
I understand division over pineapple on pizza, or whether it’s pronounced gif or gif, I’ve even taken sides myself, but people fighting over the spelling of woah or whoa take a step back now before this madness destroys us all*
*It’s whoa, by the way
If the guy behind me stands any closer I’m going to go in for a hug.
When people with bible quotes in their bio follow me…I don’t know man. I think you’re gonna have a bad time
Currently binge watching old eclipses to get caught up for tomorrow.
Can I count on you?
Of course, always.
(sits on her lap)
“Mmmm ….. grains”
It rubs the lotion on its skin and struggles with the doorknobs again.