@UnFitz: Tragically, I misread her profile. Apparently her favorite position is "reserved cowgirl."
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@TEXASVETERAN: A hooker once showed me her dollar menu. Her meat actually did resemble McDonald's.
@ThisOneSayz: Me: want a grilled cheese? 6yo: no. How about a cheeseburger without the meat. Me: you got it.
@ArchiePeeler: If anyone pulls a quarter from behind your ear you chloroform them and put them in chains in your basement and you'll always have quarters.