@AnExocticBeach

If you people would’ve used a little more alizarin crimson like Bob Ross told you to, none of this would be happening right now

@AnExocticBeach

Today is the day I write something beautifully profound

No. That was it. I’m going back to bed

@AnExocticBeach

Over the last few months I’ve collected enough wine corks to raise the Titanic

@AnExocticBeach

Quarantine Day 26
Puts pictures of mom all around the house and runs with scissors laughing maniacally

@AnExocticBeach

I know how to make her bite her lip, arch her back and curl her toes

Legos on the floor by her side of the bed

@AnExocticBeach

I’m always confused at fancy restaurants. Which spoon do you throw at the screaming toddler?

@AnExocticBeach

I guess if Porky Pig wants to flash someone, he just takes off his bowtie?