@bakedbrotatoes

How to walk up the down escalator:

Step 1:
Step 1:
Step 1:
Step 1:
Step 1:

@bakedbrotatoes

-This is my son Michelangelo.
-Oh, like the artist.
-Um no like the Ninja Turtle.

@bakedbrotatoes

-You talkin to my girl?
*pops knuckles*

-What if I am?
*cracks neck*

*dislocates shoulder*

*breaks collarbone*

*fractures skull*

@BakedBrotatoes

[Judas standing alone waiting to be picked for dodgeball]

-Come on it was one time guys

*Jesus drags the CPR dummy to his side of the gym*

@BakedBrotatoes

Girls are just like pasta. Throw her against the wall, if she sticks, she’s ready.

@BakedBrotatoes

[Job Interview]

*okay, he can’t find out I’m a wolf*

*fixes tie*

*checks breath*

IS THAT A PICTURE OF YOUR BABY SHE LOOKS DELICIOUS