I would never get a minivan because I can’t even think of 7 people I’d want to be stuck in a vehicle with.
“He be dead.”
Who? Your English teacher?
I really want a Popsicle but I’m so not in the mood for Freezer Jenga.
I’m not surprised you had a facelift..but it looks like you are.
An example of men’s inability to understand women – Me: I have Nothing To Wear!! Him: Awesome!
Well Officer..we didn’t have a bottle so that dead guy over there..
No the other dead guy..suggested “Spin The .44”..And I WON!
I can’t bend my pinky without my ring finger bending as well..is this normal?
Let’s hear your results ’cause I know you just tried it.
Where’s my cell?
That’s not my phone.
“Yes it is. I cleaned it!”
My cell’s white?
Medication for depression “may cause thoughts of suicide”. If this were so for all meds then:
Diet Pills..may cause ravenous hunger
In the movie Titanic it always bugged me that she stayed on the raft when clearly she had more body fat for warmth.