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Page of CrunkDriver's best tweets

@CrunkDriver : *creaking sounds upstairs*

Me: Alexa, what was that!?

Alexa: This home was built on land sacred to the indigenous people, now the spirit of the Wendigo is here to drag you to your death

*creaking intensifies*

Me: *purses lips* Next time, just say ghosts

@CrunkDriver: Welcome to your 40s, sometimes you sleep so poorly you injure yourself

@CrunkDriver: Out of Africa is my favorite movie about not having the continent you needed to finish your recipe

@CrunkDriver: Who called it an internal dialogue, instead of an invoice?