@DeanOkay

Trick people into thinking you’re a doctor by turning off taps with your elbows

@DeanOkay

I learned mathematical fractions from a drug dealer. He said if I don’t pay $4,000 in 7 days, I’ll lose 3 fingers.

@DeanOkay

My electric car is getting a service, so I have to drive an acoustic one.

@DeanOkay

Wish someone would invent a device that would allow me to speak instead of having to text back and forth 30 times to get my point across.

@DeanOkay

Drying out wet fireworks in the oven is not a good idea. Trust me on this

@DeanOkay

I went on the treadmill for 30 minutes today. Tomorrow I will turn it on.