Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of DothTheDoth's best tweets

@DothTheDoth : Practice self-care like a lighthouse, let your problems crash all around you but avoid it by gazing mindlessly off into the distance.

@DothTheDoth: Practice self-care like bats, avoid daylight & hug yourself adoringly while you sleep.

@DothTheDoth: Remember, you can become haunted by a ghost whenever you want. You’re an adult.

@DothTheDoth: All I want, every day, is to find a derelict spaceship, develop abnormal symptoms & then tell no one.

@DothTheDoth: Death is often a good career move if you're a poet.

@DothTheDoth: Be the reason why your priest speaks in a dead language at your exorcism.

@DothTheDoth: Practice self-care like bats, avoid daylight & hug yourself adoringly while you sleep.

@DothTheDoth: Hydrate the goths. No government stands a chance against hydrated goths.

@DothTheDoth: As your goth personal trainer, I urge you to stay in shape so that you can outrun your haunted past.

@DothTheDoth: In honor of the winter solstice I will also be cold, distant & filled with darkness.