“Oh shit, I’m supposed to go find them…”
“The kids. We were playing hide and seek.”
-my husband, about 20 minutes into a conversation he and I were having
“Your meal is being prepared and should be delivered in 30-45 minutes”
Perfect. Just enough time to eat a sleeve of Oreos.
Stop putting cauliflower where there once was something delicious.
All I want is for my kids to have a good sense of humor. They don’t have to be funny, just need to be able to recognize how hilarious I am.
I’m just your average mom, trying to convince my kids that 4:45pm is indeed their bedtime, because I’ve had enough of their shit for one day