Legend has it if u whisper IKEA 3x in the mirror an extra screw will appear & you’ll be haunted by the piece of furniture you ill-assembled.
“Gotta wake up early”
*sets alarm for 5am*
*wakes up at 4:55am to cancel alarm*
*goes back to sleep*
If someone catches you doing something inappropriate don’t stop, just do it slowly while keeping eye contact.
My life would be so much better if I could use a smokebomb to conceal my escape after being turned down by a girl.
I hate to say “I told you so”, so Im going to sing it.
Why does the bad guy always have to know some form of martial art? Why cant they just throw stuff while screaming “stay away from me!”
I feel so alive when I watch an object fall and shatter into hundreds of pieces. Not alive enough to clean up the mess though.
So, if 4 out of 5 people suffer some medical condition, does that mean the other 1 person enjoys it?