Just because a guy wants to see you naked it doesn’t mean anything, I know a guy who drove 2 days to see a donkey show.
Ever been in the middle of writing a great tweet and think, did I just run someone over?
Ok Brazil, this would be a time when it’s ok to bite an opponent.
I’m ok with women faking it in bed. I faked everything to get her there.
I don’t think The Proclaimers realized how far 500 miles really is.
My mom just replied to my text with “K.” Whooooaaa busy lady, is there some emergency over on FarmVille?
Almost 10,000 tweets, guess who’s not Employee of the Month.
My iPhone just autocorrected the word nigga to NIGGA, like whoa iPhone.
You can’t just go around yelling the N word. Jesus.
Michelle Obama should have dropped the mic and moonwalked out.