There are few situations in life which have to be resolved with violence for example-
Mosquito on your ex’s cheek.
I wanted to lose some pounds…..
So I went to the casino.
Why did the baker stop making donuts?
Because he was bored with the hole business.
Shopkeeper:This is made of pure virgin wool sir.
Me:You see I m not interested in the morals of the sheep.Just tell me,will it keep me warm?
Me : I have changed my mind.
Wife : Hope the new one is working.
I firmly believe in homeopathy because they cure everything with alcohol.
If a girl has magnetic personality and still She can’t attract the desired boy.
Then that means the boy has iron deficiency.
Friend: So, you are distantly related to the family next door, are you?
Me: Yes, their dog is our dog’s brother.
Wife :’Darling, look. I haven’t worn this in 8 years and it still fits.’
Hubby : It’s a scarf!