Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets
Follow us on Instagram. That's it, don't make us say cringy things like YouTubers say at the end of their videos. Click here to follow us
@GingerHotDish : Them: Are you a frontend or backend developer?
Me: *winking* I’m pretty developed in both places.
Anyways, that’s how I ended up in HR.
@GingerHotDish: If it weren't for the gutter my mind would be homeless.
@GingerHotDish: You're trying to get me drunk aren't you?
Me to myself
@GingerHotDish: *Eating my third bowl of ice cream*
I really thought this Keto diet would be harder.
@GingerHotDish: My friend is mad because I called her baby the cutest little freak show. The CUTEST tho... it’s like she missed that part.
@GingerHotDish: I’m sorry, but I’m never gonna apologize for who I am.
*except just then*
@GingerHotDish: Me: Alexa, make me a drink.
Her: Mom, that’s not my name and I think you’ve had enough.
@GingerHotDish: Don’t worry if she spells out “I’m fine!” in lighter fluid on your front lawn, but if she lights it... she is definitely lying.
@GingerHotDish: [At the gym]
My body: WTF
Me: I know
Body: I thought we were done with this bullshit?
Me: No, this is how it is from now on.
Body: *charley horse*
Me: Well played, bitch... well played
@GingerHotDish: I told him I’d send him nudes everyday he was sick, but we are on day 17 now... how long does the flu normally last?