@Goofpoops: Life hack :
Receive a wide assortment of yellow, orange, pink and red envelopes, free of charge, simply by not paying your bills.
@Goofpoops: If Kevin Spacey doesn't sign his name like this
Then he's pretty damn stupid...
@Goofpoops: Cop cars aren't very intimidating. Add a crazy plow covered in blood, an anarchy symbol and spinning saw blades and I'll stop in a heartbeat
@Goofpoops: In case you were wondering, Taco Bell offers free wi-fi.
Don't bother asking for the password, because it's totally "Cornhole Explosion".
@Goofpoops: Watching movies with kids:
If he/she hasn't seen it, eons and billions of questions.
If he/she has seen it, eons and billions of spoilers.
@Goofpoops: Hey!! pssst! Guys who wear camo to bars: There is a reason you're not getting laid...it's because the women can't see you..
@Goofpoops: Someone on Facebook posted "Having the BEST DAY EVER!!"
So I posted the Sarah Mclachlan animal cruelty video in the comments